One day

One day, my love
the second hand will tick forward
and we won’t be locked
in moments we can’t reach

One day, my love
beneath the stars
we will find more than dreams

One day, my love
even if we wait into eternity

One day

5 minutes

In five minutes you

permeated my soul

and in five minutes you

walked away leaving

me longing for sleep

to find you

for five minutes

We, the Unloved

We, the unloved

stand in solidarity

never touched by a hand

in true love

kissed only for ego

and screwed to feed

someone else’s soul.

We, the unloved

raise a hand in recognition

of broken hearts

and unwarranted fantasy that

plays out in dreams

of a non existent better life.

We, the unloved

know the game is played

but fall for her plot,

always the pawn

in someone else’s story.

We, the unloved

get lost in dreams

and pray for sleep

as we disappear

once again in to false comfort.

We, the unloved

wait desperately

to be

anything

but

“un”

Surrender

Surrender
to quiet moments
and silvery blues
that dance through
shadows

Surrender
to breaths that
rush and calm
between moments
in time

Surrender
to memories
that wrap around
and take hold
once again

Surrender
to resurgence
and reminders
and to the beauty
your heart brings

..

When you let go

The scars and wounds bled

Every silent insecurity confirmed

All that was left were pieces of me

Scattered in the snow

Mine alone

~The tears that fall are not for you~

They're shades of embarrassment
And the weight of sadness
That is cracking my heart

They are the taste of cheap wine
That echos in my veins
And sours in my stomach

~but they're not for you~

They're stolen kisses from secret stashes
Devoured and denied
By moments in time

They're manipulated puppet's strings
Yanked and pulled
When it suits, and only then

~but they're not for you~

They're mine alone.

Fool

Oh, I am a fool in matters of the heart
Too blind to see, but should know better
My heart's on a sleeve that is torn and shredded
far too quick to open my soul
Too naive to accept the obvious letter
The lump in my throat is always regretted
Not once but twice I fell for the charm
Enjoying the chase, the moments together
But all of the games, the other player the setter

Oh, I am a fool when it comes to the heart
But this time, oh this time
Don't break me apart

No Good

There is no good

that can come from

loving you.

You are too young

and I am too buried

in complication.

There is no good

that can come from

wanting you.

You are too much

and I am too afraid

of possibility.

There is no good

that can come from

dreaming here.

You are too surrounded

and I am shrouded

in insecurities.

But if there were good

in embracing the

pure insanity

it could only come

from loving you.

I wondered

I wondered
if memory would be flawed
and my mind would twist
as time danced on.
But the steps are the same
and the rhythm familiar
and the tango moves
in the comfortable sway.

I wondered
if my heart would beat
with the irregular patterns
of anxious desire.
Then the pounding reminder
of surprising connection
echos it’s voice with a
powerful boom.

I wondered
if time would dispel
the catching of breath
and youthful passion.
But the moment of contact
goes right to the soul
and electrifies the
need to feel.

I wondered
if my heart would weep
again when with goodbye
and parted ways.
Then lingered moments
and delayed farewells
cling to the passing
perfection of space.

I wondered
if I would wonder
what would happen in
the game of “what ifs”.
And then I wondered what
would be left to be
in the moment where
I wondered no more.

Next to you

I can’t breathe

next to you

I can’t…

breathe.

I am alive

next to you

I remember

my dreams

But I can’t breathe

next to you

I can’t…

be.

I am aware

next to you

that I

crave it

Though I can’t breathe

next to you

I can’t…

wait.

To feel safe

next to you

I could stay

forever

But I can’t breathe

next to you

I can’t…

want.

to be close

next to you

I’m not

allowed

To not breathe

next to you

I can’t…